Hello Friends, Traveling Companions,
Like each of us, I imagine, it is my longing to made a difference in some way… to live, to laugh, to love, and to leave a meaningful legacy. This week my grandsons and daughters have been ill with the flu while managing an onslaught of other life circumstances that seem to come all at once.
At times like these it is hard being so many miles away. Every alarm goes off in my ‘mommy’ soul that I am to be there to fix it somehow, or at least be there to provide a comforting cloth applied to a weary forehead. Sick or well, there is nothing better than sitting and snuggling with a little one, no matter what their age.
To shrink the distance between us I stay connected by phone, and vision them as healthy. Even amidst the challenges I observe the grace with which my daughters face the unknowns and unexpecteds, even when they might disagree. Perhaps my job as I have defined it in many ways may already be done. When I can’t rescue, nurture or help with hands on assistance it seems it is the Universe’s way of demonstrating how capable my daughter’s are, and even for me to rest assured that I have done a good job in loving them along the way. Maybe we did something right together, and now they too get to learn and apply the ‘mommy magic’ to make their little guys feel better. Through their own maneuvering through the challenges that come with the territory of motherhood I see them expand their own compassion and resilience that will be passed along, shape-shifted by their own experience and interpretation. Having the distance between us, as it seems was what was necessary this time, was somehow perfect and allowed their confidence and my letting go process to expand.
They are all on the mend, and still, just for good measure, I will share with them and with you…
Dr. Grandma Tutu’s Cheat Sheet for a Happy Life:
1. Not everyone will like you. Don’t let that stop you. Love yourself anyway. The way you treat yourself is how you teach others to treat you.
2. Some things in life just aren’t fair. Get clear on your own values, forgive quickly, loosen your grip, lean into life, learn to be compassionate by standing in the shoes of another, and treat people fairly regardless of how they treat you.
3. Mistakes are opportunities to learn, and a part of the journey, but suffering is optional. Don’t hang out with ‘victims’ and don’t be one, yourself.
4. We don’t always get what we want when we want it, but we always get what we need. There are always blessings. Accept them gratefully without whining.
5. Change is an essential part of balance, and creativity is an essential part of evolution. What you resist persists, and shift happens. Open up, dare to question, think outside the box, color outside the lines, go with the flow, listen beyond words, love yourself as much as you love others, and follow your heart no matter what your age.
6. Sometimes good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people. The good news is that you can be happy regardless of your circumstances, so respond rather than react, and focus on what’s working.
7. Strive for excellence rather than perfection, for perfection is fleeting and success required only that you get up one more time than you fall.
8. Chocolate does have nutritional value. Enjoy every bite of life, eat dessert first sometimes (ice cream is my favorite), and celebrate small steps along the way. 9. Our bodies (and sometimes our minds) will wear out. Complain less. Enjoy each moment more. Never once in the history of the Universe has worrying ever changed an outcome. Get off the ‘pity potty’ and trust that where you are is where you are meant to be. Learn to love what is.
10. No one gets out alive, but you don’t need to die alone, or live feeling alone for that matter. Your relationships are more important than things and love is the only thing you can take with you. Connect. Love yourself as much as you love others. Laugh often. Forgive quickly. Learn relentlessly, and leave an authentic legacy. Believing is seeing, so never stop believing that peace is possible.
In Joy, Rhonda
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