It’s Time for a Holiday K.I.S.S.
Dear Ones,
All around the world the holidays, regardless of the variety of the ways they are celebrated, offer us the opportunity to remember the things that are of the greatest importance in our lives. Though viewpoints other than our own might tempt us to judge our differences, the nature of the holiday spirit inspires us to stretch beyond our comfort zones to celebrate and accept the ways we are alike. We recognize that despite our cultural and religious differences, we are all good at heart and we are all in this human experience together.
Here in the western world life moves at a hurried pace, particularly during the holidays. Commercialism if left unchecked can easily overwhelm us and add to our pressures, draining all the joy from an otherwise delightful season. We try to do too much, causing simplicity and enjoyment to escape us. Swept up by the manufactured meaning of the holiday it is easy to adopt the ‘bah humbug’ approach and forget the true essence at our finger tips if we choose. The holidays can easily become a time when our expectations become too high and the perceived demands upon us too great, detouring us from the joys possible of love and connection. Life is war we make of it, after all.
I am one of those who love the holiday season. I treasure traditions, and I’m grateful for a time that inspires most people to remember to put first things first. But I haven’t always felt this way. I am a recovering ‘Scrooge’ who grew weary of the pressures of the season, eventually convincing myself that I didn’t like the holidays. However, I have since come to the realization that it was not the season’s celebrations I didn’t like, but the ‘hype’ that went along with it.
I turned to focus on that was at he heart of the holidays. I finally decided that I would not let Hallmark, Toys ‘R Us, or relentless T.V. commercials dictate whether or not I enjoyed the holidays. It was time to shake my depression, revise my skewed perspective, and take back the responsibility for creating my own meaning for myself, leaving others to their own interpretation. It was time to stop being a ‘victim’ and instead celebrate the season in a way that filled my spirit. I realized I could make the choice to ignore the media’s pressure to buy, buy, buy and instead love,m live and laugh.
To give new meaning to holidays I asked myself these questions, “What is important to me?” and “What are the ways I choose to celebrate that will generate meaning for me and the ones I love?” With small and conscious steps even the worst Scrooge can enjoy the holiday season. It’s as simple as a K.I.S.S. (Keep It Simple Sweetheart)!
Here are a few ideas to minimize stress and insure holiday happiness:
K = Keep the Holidays Simple
Traditions and rituals are great, but too easily we get tempted to take on too much. Choose to keep it simple. Don’t overindulge. Know your limits and set boundaries. Only commit to doing what you can without resentment or regret. You don’t have to please anyone but yourself. When you can’t change the circumstances, change how you view them so that happiness can remain yours throughout the holidays. Do simple things like drawing names for sharing gifts to minimize the pressure to overextend financially. Choose as a family to gift a charity instead of buying expensive gifts. Make decisions that come from your heart rather than being dictated by what you feel you ‘should’ do. Reconnect with the simple gestures that have meaning for you.
I = Inspire Yourself
Don’t make it someone else’s responsibility to make you happy. The greatest gift you can give another is to take full accountability and responsibility for your own joy. Clarify and connect with your own values and live by them. Make a conscious decision to focus on all that is working instead of being. Are you really willing to let others rob you of a good time? Wear your Teflon raincoat when you are around people who rub you the wrong way. They are not worth your energy. Just let their bad mood or insensitive comments roll right off. After all, would you rather be right or happy? You get to decide.
S = Stand in the Shoes of Others
Rather than being, caught up in the ‘me, me, me’ and ‘immediate gratification’ temptations of the season, make the conscious choice to slow down enough to listen beyond the words that are spoken. Stand in the shoes of another with the intention to become more compassionate and a better listener. Give from your heart. Seize opportunities to serve and to offer random acts of kindness without demanding recognition. Even do so anonymously to practice giving without the need to receive in return. You may be surprised at how good it feels to know you have made a difference and to realize that the giving is the gift. Discover the joy in offering presents that are of little monetary value but are rich with thoughtfulness and consideration. They will be remembered for years to come and will create memories that will be shared over and over.
S = Savor Every Moment
Life is precious, unpredictable, and messy. And amidst all of this can hold great joy. We may think we have all the time in the world, but the truth is that we never really know for certain. NEWS FLASH…Now is the only moment you really have. Treasure it. Make is special. Make the most of it. Look for the deeper meaning, for this is what creates real value in your life. Don’t waste your energy being a ‘Scrooge.’ The one you hurt most when you go numb or become grumpy is yourself. In choosing to shut down, you shut out the possibilities for the joy that the season offers, you rob yourself of your own freedom, and you deny yourself the meaningful moments that can refuel your soul.
Simple Tips for Stressing Less During the Holidays
1. Plan ahead
Some people thrive on the intensity and demands of the season, even though they complain. Be honest. If that’s you, allow yourself to jump in wholeheartedly and enjoy the stress! But if that’s not you, then try to plan ahead, identify blocks of time for each task, and do as much as you can as early as possible. Since it has to get done sooner or later, why not make it sooner, at a more comfortable? And be realistic at what you can humanly accomplish. It really doesn’t have to be ‘perfect.’ Try surrendering your ‘have to’s’ and accept what is. Experience and memories are what you get when you don’t get what you want.
2. Delegate
If you are a perfectionist, admit that in order to get everything done you may need to delegate some tasks–even though your standards may not be met. Share the shopping, cooking, cleaning, and other holiday responsibilities with others. People generally appreciate the opportunity to participate in the preparations, and there is great value in feeling a sense of sharing and working together. Everybody gets a chance to shine.
3. Get Enough Sleep
Life always looks better when you have enough sleep. During the holidays, it is easy to fall into the habit of robbing your sleep time to find the additional hours needed to get things done. However, cranky people don’t enjoy what they are doing very much and are not exactly a pleasure to be around! Getting adequate rest will help you maintain a cheerful attitude throughout the season—which is a great gift to give to all those who are near and dear to you.
4. Don’t Overindulge
Moderation is key. With so many temptations during the holidays, it is easy to splurge to excess. The problem is that we pay for it sooner or later. You don’t have to deprive yourself—just be conscious of what you eat and drink. Make your health and well being a top priority. By being moderate and making sensible choices during the holidays, you can avoid a lot of pain and self-criticism after the holidays.
5. Be Financially Realistic
Create a spending plan. It is easy to get caught up in the pressure to buy during the holidays. Spare yourself the January ‘holiday blues’ that can happen when the credit card bills arrive. Consciously plan what you will spend before you go to the mall and stick to your spending plan when you are in the stores. Detour yourself from emotional purchases.
6. Keep Life Simple
We can make life more complicated than it needs to be. Choose the things essential to you for a meaningful holiday. Focus on quality, not quantity. You don’t have to do it all…in fact, by choosing to do less, you can be more fully present, have a wonderful time, and create a memorable holiday season.
7. Enjoy the Journey, Not Just the Destination
Expand and enhance your level of enjoyment of the entire season. Choose to savor it all. Don’t dread, resist, or regret any of it. Happiness is a choice.
The New is just around the corner. Savor and celebrate the last few days of tinsel, lights and Christmas music. What is the real present after all? It is this precious moment, this one where our heart is open and where magnificent possibilities are endless. You get to choose.
From the depth of my heart, HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
P.S. Invitation to Share…
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR PUBLICATION, E-ZINE OR WEB SITE?
Please do! I request that you include this complete blurb with it:
Rhonda Hull, as founder of the The Center of Happiness, an online community for women and those who love them, is like a mother-mentor-friend-spiritual activist-sounding board and soul-sister who ‘gets it.’ She is that relentlessly accepting someone we wish we could turn to turn to when we feel over-whelmed, our doubts kick in and life seems to tough to handle alone.
As a speaker, author, story-teller, mentor, artist and matriarch who knows first hand that life is too short to not dare to live fully present, Rhonda shares from the heart of her experience and has a remarkable ability to connect authentically with both individuals and large groups, tailoring her message for every audience. As would a trustworthy friend, Rhonda nudges us to embrace the unique wisdom, courage and magnificence within each of us and she stands certain that women activating self-love is the missing piece (peace).
Do you know someone whose heart might be uplifted by the Rhonda’s insights from The Center of Happiness? If so, please feel free to forward this to whomever you like, or send them to Rhonda’s website: http://centerofhappiness.com.
Thank you! [/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]
Comments