Dear Wonderful Ones,
There’s Cancer. There’s Autism. There’s poverty, homelessness, illness, suicide, divorce, domestic violence, depression. There’s war, climate change, financial challenges and disasters.
No wonder we numb out, play small, or feel overwhelmed.
We have been so well trained to believe we are victims that it is often a stretch to transform our thinking to realize the relief that lies in how we choose to perceive ‘what is’. Daring to change our perception is how happiness can be found even in the most unlikely circumstances.
Some people believe that there are not accidents. Some believe that everything from a hang-nail to a major illness, from a financial loss to an global disaster are manifested, and some believe that it is all ‘our fault.’ At the other extreme, some believe that everything is random, and everyone but themselves are responsible for anything.
No matter what our position, sh-t happens. Sometimes perhaps randomly, sometimes perhaps predestined by some sacred contract, perhaps intentionally, as a result of our thinking, or perhaps as a result of our own mis-judgment and worry. None of us really know for sure, although we often hope we do.
Regardless, from that moment of awareness we have a choice. We get to decide how we want to experience our life and proceed accordingly. We can choose to use virtually every experience as a catalyst for helplessness, hopelessness, hate, and negativity, or use it to assign meaning for our growth, feel more deeply, love more authentically, and open ourselves to greater peace, purpose and joy.
Life coach and author, Martha Beck, refers to the term felix culpa, Latin for fortunate fault, which means a bad luck event that ends up being positive.
Over and over as I have watched many who have walked through horrific circumstances and who emerge all the better. I have witnessed my own daughters walk the path with kids on the autistic spectrum and my niece who has a son who has survived cancer with many remaining challenges continue on with courage.
I marvel at how these women consciously use their ‘bad luck’ to help them find a strength and resilience they didn’t know they had. Sometimes it has to be moment-by-moment, but they choose to be happy regardless of their circumstances, and deeper joy comes from this deliberate act of focused attention. I want to hang out with and learn more from more women like this, who have found the key to a meaningful life… the ones who know that loving themselves is an essential piece (peace).
What are ingredients for fostering our strength amidst challenges? How do we find a way to all allow, rather than resist, all that is difficult on our plate?
Dive deep inside with self-love
Trust what you find there
Focus on the abundance that exists everywhere except where humans have messed it up
Focus on and celebrate what’s working
Act on your intuition
Care less what others think
Allow life to be messy
Forgive yourself and others quickly
Give yourself permission to fall apart, determined to get up one more time than you fall
Cancel, uncreate and dissolve any and all old thoughts and beliefs that don’t allow you to perceive, know, be and receive your highest and best
Ask for support
Receive as much as you give
Share your compassion
Share your vulnerability only with those who have earned the honor
See your vulnerability as being courageous
Be grateful
Let go
Get still and meditate
Stop tying to control everything
‘Give up’, not in despair, but ‘Give up’ to the Divine by whatever name you choose
Be all that you are authentically
Be a channel of goodness
Do all that you can do
Know that you are enough
To all the courageous women who have committed to turning lemons into lemonade, I offer a deep bow of gratitude. The world is a better place because of you. When we link arms with other amazing women committed to finding the pony amidst the poop, we discover that courage is courageous and pain transforms to possibility.
Joy-fully,
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